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Madonna Demands to Sterilise Dressing Room to Prevent Fans Stealing Her DNA

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Madonna is one of the hypercorrect singers on the planet.But it appeared that she’s been suffering paranoia – Madge is so worried about her more obsessive fans that she orders sterile wipes of her dressing room after each show on her latest MDNA world tour! OMG, what a egotistic maniac!?

Madonna is afraid her fans would steal her DNA!

Moreover, she demands that only herself and her entourage are allowed backstage and no one is allowed to even look at her dressing room once it has been made ready. Concert promoter Alvaro Ramos, who is looking after the Portuguese leg of the tour, said:

We have to take extreme care. In the end it is all to protect her and make her comfortable. I do understand it but it is taken to extremeness.”

Madonna also makes sure that her personal team build her changing room so there is no danger of anyone planting any hidden cameras. Okay, I get the cameras, but why would anyone want to steal her DNA?

Oh, I’ve remembered how our Material Paranoid Girl requested a new toilet seat in her dressing room for every night of her Confessions world tour – the seat had to be inspected by her people, then installed – with an unbroken seal – by plumbers before every gig. Also she ordered three candles to protect her from negative vibes and mean-spiritedness, a relaxing foot spa complete with lavender and camomile body soak, Kabbalah water to be delivered her before every gig.

Is she losing the plot? Frightened that she may be losing out to the younger performers and has not got much more to offer? Hey Madge, no one’s to create 2 of you, trust me!

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June 23rd, 2012
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